You just met a great guy in the local coffee shop. He suggests getting together next Tuesday after work. Maybe you found the perfect girl from an online social club. She wants to meet you Wednesday for lunch. Your potential date has never been married or is divorced. How can you be sure?
Unfortunately, it does happen that the divorced date actually has a spouse and kids at home. One potential sign is someone that can only see you on weeknights. He or she is too busy on weekends. While this is not always the case, it is a red flag. There are a few other signs you should look for.
Have you been to your date's home?
Safety in dating includes not inviting a stranger into your home or going to their home until you get to know them. However, after you have been dating for a while, knowing where he or she lives is part of the package of creating a relationship. If it has been a couple of months and you are still not even sure where he lives, he could be married. If she constantly makes excuses that her home is too messy for a visit, there may be someone else living there.
Where do you go on dates?
How often do you go out in public? Really in public, not somewhere out of the way or far from where your date lives, or says they live. It might be romantic to go on long drives for a dinner out. It also may be that your date does not want to be seen with you in town. If all of your dates take place at your apartment, especially only on weeknights, you may want to look into the situation.
When you are out in public, does your date treat you more like an acquaintance? If you run into someone your date knows, how do they introduce you? If you are just Sue, the woman he met at a convention, book club or museum, there may be a problem. If you have never met any of his or her close friends or family, you have a big red flag.
Of course, many dates can pass these tests but still be married. Your date may say they are divorced when they are only separated. If you have suspicions, run a background check. You can also search marriage and divorce records; this is public information. Do not allow yourself to get into a situation that leads to heartbreak or worse.